The Days Fashioned For Me

“Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.  And in your book they all were written, The days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them” (Psalm 139:16).

One day last Summer as I was reading the news online, I came across an article about abortion.  For me, abortion has always been one of those things that was to sad to talk about or even to think about. So, if the topic ever came up or came to mind I would push it back and out, “out of sight out of mind” so to speak.  But this particular article really got my attention. The topic was Partial Birth Abortions and how several U.S. States were offering this particular procedure.  So, with wide eyes, gaping mouth and a heart full of sorrow, grief and pain I read on to the end.  I was shocked! Never in my life had I ever even considered that such a horrendous thing existed.  When I finished reading that article, I couldn’t stop thinking about it.  I cried with tears pouring down my face.  I couldn’t stop the tears from flowing.  This abortion issue had confronted me full force and I could not push it away. I could not stop thinking about the countless precious little lives so full of hope and potential and praise and glory to God, that have been painfully destroyed and blotted from existence.

Pause for a moment; If there is anyone reading this page who has already had an abortion and you are struggling with remorse, regret, or self forgiveness issues, an article in the “Testimony’s” category titled “Forgiven” will be a blessing to read and I recommend it. It is not specifically about abortion but the forgiveness topic rings true for every kind of self-forgiveness that exists.

Speechless yet filled with emotion, I thought about my own humble beginnings.  I was conceived in a broken family who did not want me from the start.  I was despised and rejected, even hated before I was born by my birth father. I was the fifth child in the family and the only girl. It was thought that I was the fruit of infidelity, but that was not actually the case after all.  Thankfully, my birth mother loved me enough to let me live even though abortion was a very real option. I was carried to birth and then given away.  My adoptive parents were friends of my birth family. My adoptive parents loved me very much and I  loved them both very much too. They are both deceased now, resting in Jesus, and I miss them both tremendously.

Personally, I do not recommend giving away a child to your close friends or neighbors because there is much temptation with the extended family’s for gossip, and most people don’t understand or just don’t care that little ones understand a lot more than they think they do. My relatives on both my moms side and my dads side of the family to varying degrees made me feel like an outcast from a very young age.  I recommend that if you are unable to lovingly care for your child and are looking to place your child up for adoption to go through a reputable adoption agency and even better, a Christian adoption agency. That way you know your child will be given to a good loving family that will love this child and give them the best opportunity for an abundant and happy life. There are so many family’s out there that cannot have children and are praying for a child to adopt and love as their very own.

So, there I was, crying for the unborn. Tears streaming down my face, my neck and my chest.  I couldn’t stop the silent tears, the top of my shirt was saturated.  Then something I didn’t expect happened. Spontaneously, in my heart and mind, I started to connect my life with theirs.  And there arose in me a strong desire to do something, to help these unborn children in some way. Doubtless, their is always an abundance of blessings that come to a woman when she chooses Life over abortion.  It was at that very moment my Heavenly Father, my Heavenly “Daddy” comforted me, and put a song in my heart to share.  These are the words and this is the song;    “God Bless My Momma” by: Hadassah Baradin

“God Bless My Momma”
By Hadassah Baradin

Verse 1
Momma, can you hear, my little heart beating inside
Momma, I’m so happy that God gave me life
And even though I’m tiny, someday you’ll realize
That I am here, because I am apart of Gods plan

Refrain
For all my days were planned by God before I came to be
So be brave be strong, so I can live the life planned out for me

Refrain
Be brave be strong, life is such a precious gift
In the presence of the Son of God, who died so I could live
God bless my Momma, now and throughout eternity

Verse 2
Momma, it won’t be long, till I can look into you’re face
Momma, I am waiting till you can hold me in you’re arms
I’ll do my best to make you smile, I’ll be small for just awhile
And I will always love you, we’ll be friends

Refrain
All my days were planned by God before I came to be
So be brave be strong, so I can live the life planned out for me
Be brave be strong, life is such a precious gift
In the presence of the Son of God, who died so I can live

God bless my Momma, now and throughout eternity
God bless my Momma, now and throughout eternity
God bless my Momma, now and throughout eternity

I want all who read this to understand, I am 50 years old now. I have had a happy life for the most part. I have a husband and a daughter whom I cherish and love, and I am so happy to be alive!  I wake up in the morning and say, “Thank you Heavenly Father for this brand new day of life.”  I am so happy to have had the chance to grow up and get to know Jesus Christ my Savior, and my Heavenly Father. And I am so happy to know I have a place in His House; in His Eternal Kingdom in Heaven some day!